Check Your Elf Before You Wreck Your Elf (Christmas EP 2013)

by MC117

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In 2012, MC117 released a free three-song EP of terrible Christmas music. In 2013 he resolved to release a second EP that was even worse. Welcome to the twisted fruits of that labor.

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released December 22, 2013

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MC117 Redmond, Washington

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Mocking music that takes itself a little (or a lot) too seriously, MC 117 produces pan-referential straight-faced commentary of hip hop, video games, and pop culture at large. Focusing on audial allusions and lyrical sleight-of-hand, this satire auteur carves his own genre in the fertile ground between "knockoff" and "ripoff". ... more

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Track Name: The Twelve Days of Christmas
On the 12th day of Christmas
My true love gave me
12 Drummers Drumming
11 Pipers Piping
10 Lords-a-Leaping
9 Ladies Dancing
8 Maids-a-Milking
7 Swans!
6 Geese-a-Laying
5 Golden Rings
4 Calling Birds
and 3 French Hens
2 Turtle Doves for special friends
Are what my my true love game me
And a Partridge in a Pear Tree.
Track Name: Angels We Have Heard On High
Angels we have heard on high
Sweetly singing o’er the plains
And the mountains in reply
Echoing their joyous strains

Gloria
In excelsis Deo!
Gloria
In excelsis Deo!

Shepherds, why this jubilee?
Why your joyous strains prolong?
What the gladsome tidings be
Which inspire your heavenly song?
Come to Bethlehem and see
Him Whose birth the angels sing;
Come, adore on bended knee,
Christ the Lord, the newborn King.

Gloria
In excelsis Deo!
Gloria
In excelsis Deo!
Track Name: The Advent Story (feat. MC3PO)
Now here's a little story I've got to tell
About two poor peasants from Israel
It started way back in history
The advent: Joseph and his wife Mary
Nazareth was a village way far from here
Beth, Mary’s cousin, had a bundle of cheer
Barren she began, silent was her man
But she wound up great with child by Jehovah’s hand
Young and holy was Mary
Waitin for Joseph, was his bride-to-be
No son was coming ‘round ‘cuz she celibate
Her love-life had no stories she could tell of it
Walking down the trail she ran into a male
His name was Gabriel, she said “Howdy”, he said “Hail!”
He told her she was favored and gonna have a boy
His birth would be glad tidings filling people with joy
She didn’t understand how she could be equipped
To build a baby in her womb, some steps had gotten skipped
She said, “Where is this bun
inside my oven from?”
He said, “God’s will is done
In giving you God’s son.”
Joe was quick out the door, before they got wed
An angel came to his dream and this is what he said
“Now my name is Gabriel, I bear a message from God
Your girl has got Emmanuel inside of her bod
Your judgement’s premature; her chastity’s assured
It’s God’s command you take her hand, He’s made Himself heard
The angel said to him he should adopt the boy as kin
For he will be messiah saving his people from their sin
Now Joseph woke up, knew what to do
He went and found Mary who soon would be due
She was in no condition for travelling
But he couldn’t delay, because he feared the king:
Joe said “I’ll ride with you back to my ancestor’s home
Herod’s askin me for all the money we owe him
We gotta leave quick, we gotta make tracks
He’ll kill us if we skip on his tax”
Joe... packed up his hun, their trip had begun
And right about time she’s gonna have her son
The King Jesus was on his way
And they needed to stop for a spot they could lay
They rode across country for Bethlehem
The road was bumpy till the late P.M.
The town was crowded and the vacancy thin
There was no empty spot they could stay at the inn
Joseph said, “Bro, got room for us?”
The guy said, “We’re full, but the stable does”
Mary said, “Get ready, ‘cuz it’s time, hunny.
The manger’s free, and this kid’s leaving my tummy”
She gave birth to Jesus, right next to the sty
A star lit him up shining from the sky
Magi showed up as shepherds came to see
The king of kings and the prince of peace
“Hail Mary, we these gifts confer
The gold and the frankincense and also the myrrh”
Herod was jealous and feared God’s grace
So he ordered every baby boy be killed in the place
Wise men peaced out, the shepherds skipped
Joe had a dream where he got tipped
Mary grabbed the baby, to Egypt they rolled;
The advent story is what you’ve been told